bouncy castle

1 teaspoon of sugar syrup
3 dashes of bitters
2 – 2.5 ounces whiskey

Fill small old fashion glasses with ice and set aside to chill.

Stir the above ingredients with large ice cubes until thoroughly chilled. Empty the old fashioned glasses and a swirl a dash of absinthe in each one - discarding any left over liquid. Strain the liquor into each chilled and swirled glass. Twist a peel of lemon over each glass and drop it on top as a garnish. Serve with a small glass of ice water on the side as a chaser.

if only these were true

• Hi, you're not late. Its my watch, its always fast.
• You look so sexy playing air guitar.
• Oh nice! You notice my breast.
• Oh no, if I wanted foreplay, I would have asked for it.
• That's ok. You'll remember my birthday next year.
• After sex, I'm out like a light.
• She meant nothing to you! Well, if you put it that way, I forgive you.
• Of course you can have some money for a lapdance.
• That's so funny! I collect comic books too.
• I could listen to you talk football all day.
• Can I ask you a question, can my friend join us?
  

Looking at the statements above, what a lame list. Ok ok, I've been late on a date before, I'll give you that but it wasn't by choice.

0-1.

I've never played air-guitar in front of a girl. Lame!

1-1.

Breast, yes of course.

1-2.

Who in the their right minds do not appreciate foreplay? Any guys who don't, don't deserve to have the woman beside them at all.

2-2.

Again another faux-pas, forgetting birthdays. Never to be done.

2-2.

Konk-out right after sex, that's just pathetic. Do people actually do this??

3-2.

This next one is a bit tricky, I've been in situations like this. It's never that straight forward.

3-3.

Borrowing money for a lapdance just don't happen unless you're with an escort or your liberal sister.

4-3.

Too coincidental to happen when you're back-packing in India to meet a hot American beach babe with the same interest. In fact, the idea of a Californian girl roughing it out just simply doesn't exist.

5-3.

No women, I'll repeat, NO WOMEN will ever listen to you babbling about how impeccable Torres's hair or Ronaldo's abs look like. If you do, chances are you're gay.

6-3.

Threesome, Foursome, Group, Orgy? Been there, done that. There is women out there who are into it and they are not ugly as people will let you know.

7-3.

Final score: 7-3 to me. I win.

dive! dive! dive!

The Brunette decided to go to the Natural History Museum's newest exhibition The Deep. It was a laugh as both of us hadn't been there for a while. Of course, the crowds were out and children everywhere. Usually this would annoy me but not today. I've taken my Prozac and everything is just fine. It was a really a well curated exhibition, full of information and full of specimens dating back from the late 1800s. The lighting for the space was dimmed thus making every specimen there glow in the dark. My favourite item there was a 'lilly', a living organism that looks like the flower but have not evolved for millions of years. Simply extraordinary. Two-and-a-half hours later, exhausted with deep-sea submarines and ferocious looking fishes we headed to Knightsbridge for a much needed drink. 2 margaritas please!

between aisle 4 & 5

Lynx Part Trois...

I did say to close friends that Waitrose, M&S or Sainsbury's are the best places to get a date. Did they listen? No. Will they listen now? Probably. Too late chaps. The market is saturated now.

a conversation with hitesh

Fucking internet connection is out again!! I'm sick of calling SKY everytime this happens. Every bloody calls and I'm paying for the fuckers to fix the damn problem! Isn't it their fucking problem to fix in the first place?! I'm the Goddamn fucking customer for fuck sake!!

ME: Hello, my broadband is out again. This is the third time this week
SKY: Hello Sir. Thank you for calling SKY. I am Hitesh, how can I be you assistance today?
ME: Didn't you hear me? My Broadband is out again for the third time this week.
SKY: Ok. Sorry about that. Are you in front of your computer?
ME: Yes.

After 15 minutes of opening and closing windows, applying new properties on windows and waiting for the computer to restart a few times...

SKY: It appears that perhaps the BT line is down
ME: So, when will it be up again? SKY: I have no info on that at this time.
ME: You're telling me that BT line is down three times this week and you can't tell me when it will be up and running?
SKY: Yes sir. Unfortunately, we are not supplied with that information.
ME: You are not helping the situation. What am I gonna do in the meantime? Watch TV? I've got work to do.
SKY: Is there an internet cafe nearby? Perhaps, that will help you out first while BT fix the problem.

At this time, I nearly wanted to scream down the phone and tell SKY to fuck off! I mean, it isn't Hitesh's fault but nevertheless, he's in line for the barrage of abuse...

ME: [blood veins popping out at the site of my temple] Fine! That's all thanks.
SKY: Mr Date, thank you for calling SKY. Is there anything else I can help you with?
ME: No!
SKY: Just to remind you that we are here to help you. Looking into your account, it seems that you're eligable for SKY+ box and full broadband and SKY Talk for only 35 pounds. Would you like me to do that for you?
ME: NO THANK YOU!
SKY: Thank you for calling SKY and I hope you'll hav.....[CLICK]

I couldn't hack it anymore, I had to hang up! Folks, no Lynx advert for today. Blame SKY.

kidnapped

Yet another Lynx ad... How many is many? When is it enough? 1, 2, 3, 5, 8 or 15?

The ample busts and bums, the never ending legs, the wavy locks, the curled eye lashes, the pouting lips, the 'Fuck Me' eyes are so irresistible. I'm only a man for God sake, we have limits! Poor chap, no wonder he's distraught. Once you've lived that life, to suddenly be pulled back to reality and spend his whole life around an 'inactive' woman - it must be terrible. My heart goes out to him.

Guido, it's only an advert!

coffee or tea sir?

For the next few posts till the end of the month I'll be looking back at previous Lynx adverts. Unless you've been living in the caves in Afghanistan for the past 10 years or so, I'm sure you'll be able to recall some of the classic moments. Why Lynx and not Architecture? Well, after spending 13/14 hours of Architecture, the thought of blogging about it after work is taxing. So, I now officially declare a free from any Architectural post here in Alcoholic Architect -at least until I've early of next month.

Adverse publicity has been generated by the product's advertisements for encouraging sexual promiscuity and sexism. Just imagine an 11 hour flight to Hong Kong on the Lynx jet. Forget about Virgin Atlantic, I might have to terminate my membership and loyalty card. Sorry Richard! For now, I have to contend with the excellent service on the Virgin Clubhouse lounge at Heathrow.

a flower at last

Ah-ha! It's Chelsea Flower Show yet again. The sun is blazing for the past one week I've been seeing the preparation for the event. Unfortunately for this year, I'm not able to attend the show's opening day. Crossing Battersea Bridge always brings back sweet nostalgia. Memories of Battersea Park; the walk, the talk, the lazy Sundays, the feelings, the laugh, the tears, the silence and the soothing caress. Brunette, for that I thank you. I've always associated Chelsea Flower Show a point from where I start my new year. Such is the blossoming of the flower; it is also a start of a new life. My fondness for Chelsea and its surrounding area is prevalent in my weekly walks exploring its streets. Townhouses, flats and semi-detached houses are embraced with lush greenery reminds me of my childhood. A childhood that have so many hopes. I've lost some parts of me since then but recently manage to regain back some my route and momentum. Even though it's a small step, I'm rejuvenated by the progress. For that I thank you again, my Brunette.

Ps: At least this flower doesn't die and no watering is needed. Enjoy.

what are you saying?

you make me say [x3]; oh; you make me say [x3]

Chorus
I'm from the East Coast but I’m falling so hot a nigger got me crib walking
I’m from the suburbs but it's that good you make a good girl wanna get to the hood
you make me say [x3]
so good got me speaking different languages

is you alive; like a side du; all I wanna do is like be inside you; ride you; try to find you; fill you
revive you; going with your bad self baby cause I do adore; and I give you more; put it on you all the time you know me a more; we got for sure, pure, alivea lore; don’t trip I ain't leaving you for
Jake got Beyonce I got Shante; with no entree that's my baby; you know the thing about
when I bring em out feels so good I had to sing about; get it get it now; we flying out of town checking in the suite; pedicure on my feet; Miss Bow Wow queen of the town; hey yo Jaz tell em how I put it down

Chorus

is it the way you look; is it the way you walk; is it the way you cook; is it the way you talk; I think it's all of the above; no play time in the day time making love; kids go to school; we can act a fool; skinny dip in the pool; do it real smooth; Miss Bow Wow queen of the town; hey yo Jaz tell em how I put it down

Chorus

hey baby; oh oh oh oh; you got me going outta my head; oh oh oh oh oh; you got me saying thing I don't understand; ladies, if your man make you say, he hear to stay, he's hear to stay [x2]

oh oh yes I am; this my plan; you my girl, I’m your man; take your pain; take my hand; take my name; make my kids; do your thing; ain't no game; show no shame; if I'm the boss, boss lady must be your name; so I got you got 2 1 2; but your face on my back brand new tattoo; 20 year in the game what love won't do; a lot of women want me but I want you; you look cute when you smile so I renewed our vows; nowadays I ain't moving that wow; I changed my style it might happen to you; what gotten to me shit I gotten to you; and start raping about things like love and being true; now maybe we could make another baby or two

Chorus

you make me say [x3]; so good got me speaking different languages

wicker basket

Edinburgh-based Groves-Raines Architects recently completed a project for a small composting shed in a private garden. The Architects was awarded an American Institute of Architects Excellence in Design Award. Compromising of Corten Steel, the structure is an organic extension of the garden with its woven edging to the paths.

shapely shadows

'.....sex and love have become polarised through guilt. In such a context sex can achieve purification only through love. In the minds of the French middle classes, sex, even where love is absent, is a source of pleasure to which every human being has an inalienable right. This applies to women as well as men. Adultery is widely perceived as one of the principal components of marriage.' I suddenly thought of friends, family & aquiantances. All those unnecessary fights & grievance they endured. The words that was said that couldn't be taken back, the words
that should have been said & the words that couldn't be said. Far too much grief, is that what most relationships are all about?! I couldn't do that again, not again. Who made it a normality that relationships & pain come hand-in-hand? What's so confusing about love, sex, passion & desire? We make it far too complicated because of our own guilt. We are the harshest critic of ourselves.

'...that passion and desire should be accommodated within a marriage. You navigate your way through these emotions, treating your spouse as carefully as you can in the process. But on no account do you leave them' - How true!

tree top

High on an eastern-facing ridge with views downtown Los Angeles, the Banyan Tree house is an art studio and sanctuary. Rockefeller Partners (RPA) was originally commissioned by the client to design a residence that was never realized but working together once again on this project; they were able to create a tree house with a striking butterfly roofline. The structure is perched on top of steel pylons that emulate natural branches. The Architects have design not a literal tree house but instead an interpretation of one that pays homage to the pre-existing tree. All the surfaces of the residence are covered by wood (cedar & walnut) thus creating warmth. Every surface of the tree house is appointed with wood, creating an unparalleled level of warmth.

12 months

I was walking around Kensington the other day and I suddenly came across so many alluring women in the street. It's times like this that I'm so thankful that I'm living in London. After a morning like this, who cares about the noise pollution, the millions of chewing gum on the pavement, the overcrowded tube, the late buses, the endless road works by British Gas or Thames Water and the other annoying things a Londoner would expect. As an avid fan of beauty (as all Architects are!), I've decided to share with you some illustrations from a calendar in 1945. The makeup might have moved on but the proportions have stayed the same. Enjoy!

Ps: I'll be posting a lot more pictures and video for the purpose of appreciating beauty other than Architecture for this month as I think I'm overloaded with building regulations to be thinking about writing more about buildings. A man needs a break, once in a while.

volumetric orchards

ARX have created a private house in rural Romeirão, Portugal surrounded with small plantations and orchards. The site faces a steep slope overlooking a small river and mountains. From the Architects first visit, they have suggested a volume lying on the slope with its entrance facing the walkway and secluding itself from neighbours while retaining the views of the southern valley. The long volume whose elements create the primary exterior space becomes part of the terrain. Courtyards are excavated for intimacy and extra privacy.

need a fix

Am I addicted to sex? Don't laugh cause this is a serious question. What is an addiction? To answer this, I've added some excerpts from wiki... Patrick Carnes beliefs that the cycle begins with the "Core Beliefs" that sex addicts hold:

1. "I am basically a bad, unworthy person."
2. "No one would love me as I am."
3. "My needs are never going to be met if I have to depend on others."
4. "Sex is my most important need."

These beliefs drive the addiction on its progressive and destructive course:

• Pain agent — First a pain agent is triggered / emotional discomfort (e.g. shame, anger, unresolved conflict). A sex addict is not able to take care of the pain agent in a healthy way.

• Dissociation — Prior to acting out sexually, the sex addict goes through a period of mental preoccupation or obsession. Sex addict begins to dissociate (moves away from his or her feelings). A separation begins to take place between his or her mind and his or her emotional self.

• Altered state of consciousness / a trance state / bubble of euphoric fantasized experience — Sex addict is emotionally disconnected and is pre-occupied with acting out behaviours. The reality becomes blocked out/distorted.

• Preoccupation or "sexual pressure" — This involves obsessing about being sexual or romantic. Fantasy is an obsession that serves in some way to avoid life. The addict's thoughts focus on reaching a mood-altering high without actually acting-out sexually. They think about sex to produce a trance-like state of arousal to eliminate the pain of reality. Thinking about sex and planning out how to reach orgasm can continue for minutes or hours before they move to the next stage of the cycle.

• Ritualization or "acting out." — These obsessions are intensified by ritualization or acting out. A sex addict first cruises, then goes to a strip show to heighten arousal until they are beyond the point of saying no. Ritualization helps distance reality from sexual obsession. Rituals induce trance and further separate the addict from reality. Once the addict begins the ritual, the chances of stopping that cycle diminish greatly. They give into the pull of the compelling sex act.

• Sexual compulsivity — The next phase of the cycle is sexual compulsivity or "sex act". The tensions the addict feels are reduced by acting on their sexual feelings. They feel better for the moment, thanks to the release that occurs. Compulsivity simply means that addicts regularly get to the point where sex becomes inevitable, no matter what the circumstances or the consequences. The compulsive act, which normally ends in orgasm, is perhaps the starkest reminder of the degradation involved in the addiction as the person realizes they are a slave to the addiction.

• Despair — Almost immediately reality sets in, and the addict begins to feel ashamed. This point of the cycle is a painful place where the Addict has been many, many times. The last time the Addict was at this low point, they probably promised to never do it again. Yet once again, they act out and that leads to despair. They may feel they have betrayed spiritual beliefs, possibly a partner, and his or her own sense of integrity. At a superficial level, the addict hopes that this is the last battle.

According to Mr.Carnes, for many addicts, this dark emotion brings on depression and feelings of hopelessness. One easy way to cure feelings of despair is to start obsessing all over again. The cycle then perpetuates itself.

mothers delight

Forrest Fulton Architecture created a mother's retreat in the woods to escape from her hectic daily routine to a secluded resting space. The Architect conceived a small, protective, introspective hull below an expansive floating space of a boat’s deck. The hull is a 7 ft wide, 8 ft long half-sunken into the ground. Three small windows frame surrounding views to promote serene enclosure. A cantilevered wooden deck hovers over the landscape. As you would expect, several restrictive construction conditions influenced the design and assembly of the retreat including no electricity, so materials had to be pre-cut before transported to site.

WMDD's

A Muslim for Miss USA?!?! Rima Fakih made history by becoming the first Muslim crowned Miss USA. Donned in a gold bikini and a strapless white dress for the pageant, she will return to Las Vegas in August to represent America in the Miss Universe contest.

She comes from a Muslim and Christian family originally from Lebanon. After living in Queens, N.Y., where Fakih attended a Catholic high school, the family settled in Dearborn, Mich., home to one of the largest Arab-American communities in America. Many Muslims are critical of beauty pageants as lewd and degrading to women (yawn! yawn!). At the same time, Fakih, 24, is being hailed as a symbol of Muslim-American integration that shatters the stereotype of the cloaked and dour Muslim woman.

Since Miss Fakih's crowning, it has reinforced my suspicion that Muslim girls can be hot... Salam wa aleikum.

forking cork!!!

London International Wine Fair is back! Invitation ready, kidneys ready, call divert ready...why am I still writing this blog?! Woke up this morning with 23 invitation emails for tasting and dinner for the next 3 days. This is one of the days in the year that all the alcoholic buddies comes out of the woodwork and celebrate the sweet nectar of intoxicating drinks. All this under the pretence of work of course! You have to love what you do; and passionate in your career is a good thing.

Hopefully, I'll remember the gossips, the best wines to purchase and the good food. Chances are it is all going to be a blur of good memories. Work as usual, I guess.

weighlessness

Joaquín Torres & Rafael Llamazares of The Architecture Studio A-cero have designed housing in the outskirts of Madrid. Designed entirely of sculptural inspiration, blocks of marble travertine in curved shapes and edges emphasize the weightlessness to the building. The main entrance is made of dark granite that contrasts with the facade while large windows facilitate lighting into the house. The 1.000 sqm space plays a dialogue with between the natural environment and design.

garden strips

Los Molles House is weekend house for a large family without a panoramic view of the Pacific Ocean thus allowing the Architects to orientate the residence in a less expected viewpoint. The brief required a 'minimum' spatial needs of a large family, indicating that if the program was built in one single volume there would be little open space; something undesirable due to the qualities of the site.

The Architects have divided the space in five parallel strips, occupying the site in its full length. The interior scheme of the residence are organized into garden-house-garden-house-garden spaces; this fragmentation defines the levels, produces flow between inside and outside spaces thus creating parallel interior and exterior connections to encourage a more casual life outdoors.In winter, as the number of people reduces, a more inward looking lifestyle is adopted by keeping only the 2nd floor open.

once before...

Commitment. Committed. To commit. How things have changed from what I remembered. The promises and hope that once protected have slipped. The promises and hope that once cherished have dissipated. What's left is an unspoken truce only to be understood through the sympathetic eyes. Barriers that once absent are now longer and deeper than the Great Wall. Perhaps, that's how the cards fall and holding on to a losing hand isn't worth a bluff against a straight flush.

A famous boxer I can't remember quoted saying 'people will not remember me because of the many times I fell down against 'A', they'll remember me because of the many times I got back up' - well said, Mr Boxer.

raw, light and white

Tasmania an island at the most southern point of Australian is the location of our practice Dock4. The house on Bonnet hill is a modest building of 100 sqm situated on a large rural site. The north facing 2 storey house is cement clad. Dock4 Architecture designed to house to be permeable from 3 sides thus transferring from inside to outside with ease. The Architects have chosen raw materials (many unfinished and low costs) due to limited choices available.

thanks kiefer

What an amazing (?), intriguing (?!), screwed up (?!?), depressing (?!?!) evening it has been. Gordon Brown stepped down, David Cameron moving to No:10, Nick Clegg as deputy, George Osbourne as Chancellor to the Exchequer, William Hague as Foreign Sec, overnight weather dipping to the minus regions, lower part of Oxford St is still under road works and I'm in great need of BBQ Ribs. As I drank the deserving golden nectar of Bud Light, I felt I should have a couple more after. It has been a rough few months and I'm still standing except for a couple of bruises and broken ego. When you start feeling that you 'deserve' something, that's when you know it's bad. On a much bigger level, it is a similar situation with British politics and the new coalition government.

Ps: Kiefer is NOT the ambassador for the beer above & that is NOT my fingers. Disclaimer done.

candy floss

HSH Architekti built a house on a sloping terrain on the outskirts of Černín, taking the same slope into its internals for floors. The Architects have alternated the interior with straights and sloping floor surfaces to define the building’s external appearance. The sloping floor is a response to the clients brief for accommodating a movie projector. Vila Hermína has only one opening per façade and the pink coat is actually a sprayed polyurethane insulation. The Architects have chosen pink to credit their favourite building of Versuchsanstalt fur Wasserbau und Schiffbau by Ludwig Leo.